The Corners of My Mind (5 of 13)

      MRiley99@AOL.COM
      Sun, 14 Oct 2001 20:32:38 EDT

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      Vanya smiled at the mental picture.  "You think he's overreacting?
      You don't think your disappearing for hours at a time - supposedly
      while asleep - and returning in torn, bloody clothing isn't
      something to be concerned about?"
      
      "Well, when you put it like that," Richie retorted with a wry grin,
      then shrugged.  "Whatever it is, it'll probably work itself out,
      sooner or later."
      
      "You think so?"  Her only answer was another shrug of the
      redhead's shoulders.
      
      She made a mental note of that, and moved on.  "You called
      Duncan - Mac - a mother hen. Is that a new experience for you?
      Being mothered?"
      
      "I don't have to tell you that Immortals don't have parents.  Not real
      ones, anyway, but there was a woman when I was little...Emily
      Ryan.  I thought she was my mother for a while."
      
      "And where is she now?"
      
      "She...she died when I was about four."
      
      "And there's been no one since then?"
      
      "Lots of foster mothers, but nobody special...except Tessa."
      
      "Tessa?"
      
      "Yeah, she was Mac's...she and Mac were an item for a long time.
      A long time by my clock, anyway.  She acted like my mother
      sometimes, even though she wasn't old enough.  I think she wanted
      kids pretty bad.  She would've been a great mom," he finished, just
      above a whisper.
      
      "And where is Tessa now?"
      
      "She's...dead."  There was just the barest hesitation in his answer as
      he shifted restlessly in his chair, eyes sliding away to survey the
      room.  His gaze drifted to the display case on the wall beside him
      and he sprang to his feet without warning.
      
      "This is really old, isn't it?" he asked, finger following the lines of
      the short-bladed, gold-hilted scimitar encased within the glass
      receptacle.
      
      "Yes, it is - circa 1300 A.D.  How did she die?"
      
      "Die?" Richie repeated, his attention centered on the blade.
      
      "Tessa.  How did she die?"
      
      "She was shot."
      
      "How long ago?"
      
      "Two years," he said, eyes vacant as he stared straight ahead.  He
      gave himself a mental shake and turned to face her.  "They were
      going to get married, did you know that?"
      
      "No, I didn't.  How did you feel about that?"
      
      "I thought it was great.  I was gonna be best man."  He wore a
      brilliant smile for all of thirty seconds, then it faded away to be
      replaced by that guarded expression once more.  "Yeah, well...that
      was a long time ago."
      
      "Two years," Vanya reminded him.
      
      "Yeah," he droned, missing the irony.
      
      "Didn't Sean tell me that you had your first death two years ago?"
      
      "That's right."
      
      "Rough year," Vanya observed.
      
      Richie gave a short, humorless laugh.  "Rough day."
      
      "I don't understand."
      
      Sighing tiredly, the redhead moved away from the weapon.  "Tessa
      and I were shot to death by the same guy," he explained.
      
      Korsikov carefully schooled her features to hide her surprise.  "I
      see.  That must have been very difficult for you, losing your
      mother-figure and your mortality at the same time."
      
      Richie shrugged yet again, making the petite Immortal long to
      shake a response out of him, though outwardly she remained calm
      as she watched him move to the couch and flop down upon it.
      
      "Like I said, it was a long time ago."
      
      "But you thought quite a lot of her," Vanya persisted.
      
      "Everybody loved Tessa," he reflected softly, staring at the
      clenched fists resting in his lap.  He closed his eyes for a moment,
      then opened them and turned his gaze to her.  "Look, no offense or
      anything, but what does all this have to do with me sleepwalking?"
      
      "Maybe nothing.  Why?  Does it make you uncomfortable to talk
      about what happened?"
      
      "Talking about it won't change anything.  Tessa'll still be gone."
      
      "She'll still be gone, yes, but sometimes talking can help a great
      deal," Vanya contradicted him.  "You might be surprised."
      
      The look Richie shot her was clearly skeptical. "Surprises aren't
      one of my favorite things.  They usually involve death or sword-
      wielding Immortals, or both," he informed her.
      
      "You're much too young to be so cynical," Vanya scolded mildly,
      feeling a sudden protectiveness for the relatively new-born
      Immortal.
      
      "Hey, I resemble that remark," he quipped, throwing her a cocky
      grin that was extremely short-lived.  "Vanya...nice name.  Where
      are you from originally?"
      
      "Russia.  A small village outside Stalingrad.  You wouldn't
      recognize the name - it doesn't exist now.  The Cossacks ravaged it
      in one of the Czar's pogroms."  Her tone was pensive with just a
      touch of anger.
      
      "I'm sorry."
      
      "Thank you - but as you said - it was a long time ago.  Besides,
      we're here to talk about you," she reminded him with a knowing
      smile.
      
      "Not much to talk about," Richie hedged.
      
      "Oh, I wouldn't say that.  Why don't we jump to these nightly walks
      of yours?  You have no recollection of them at all?"
      
      "It's like I told Mac.  I remember going to bed, but it's like I'm
      drugged or someone's taking over my body, cuz, next thing I know,
      I'm outside somewhere struggling for air, and I look like I've been
      through a meat grinder."
      
      "And what makes you think this is a case of sleepwalking?" Vanya
      asked, making a quick entry on her workpad.
      
      Richie squirmed in his seat, uncomfortable with the subject matter.
      
      "Mac and Joe followed me last night," he admitted.  "I walked
      right by them up to the roof of my building and jumped off.  I
      guess I was really out of it."
      
      "You don't think there's a possibility that you were drugged?"
      
      "I don't see how.  I didn't eat or drink the same things every night.
      A few times I didn't eat dinner at all - too tired.  One night earlier
      this week I crashed at a friend's house while he was away, just to
      be sure it wasn't something in my apartment, but it happened there,
      too."
      
      "Well, it does sound as if you've given it a lot of thought."
      
      Richie rolled his eyes at that. "Oh, yeah, I think about it all right.
      Seems like it's all I think about anymore.  I thought maybe I was
      losing it until Mac came up with the sleepwalking idea," he
      confessed.
      
      "That hadn't occurred to you?" Vanya asked.
      
      "Not really.  I mean, I never did it before.  Why start now?" he
      reasoned.
      
      She smiled, trying to project encouragement. "Good question.
      That's what we're here to find out."
      
      "Yeah."  A huge yawn broke across Richie's face and he squelched
      it in embarrassment. "Sorry, I haven't gotten much sleep lately."
      
      "No I don't suppose you have."  She set her pad and pen aside.  "I'll
      tell you what, I think we could use a break.  I cleared the rest of
      my appointments for the day when Sean called, so that's not a
      worry.  Why don't you stretch out for a while and see if you can't
      take a little nap while I go talk to your friends?"
      
      "A nap, huh?" he repeated, grinning in spite of himself.  "I hate to
      admit it, but that sounds pretty good about now."
      
      "It's decided, then." She rose to her feet and moved to stand before
      him.  "What would you like me to tell Duncan and Mr. Dawson, if
      anything?  Everything you've told me is completely confidential, of
      course, unless you say otherwise."
      
      "Mac and Joe already know about all the stuff we talked about, so
      it doesn't make much difference.  I mean, it's no big deal."
      
      "All right. As long as I have your permission," she affirmed,
      turning toward the door.
      
      "Sure, why not?" Richie murmured drowsily, kicking off his shoes
      and stretching out on the couch, a throw pillow under his head.
      "Doesn't matter," he added softly, eyes drifting shut.
      
      Vanya turned back to the couch for a moment, taking in the young
      face relaxed in sleep, her own brow furrowed in concern.  Having
      died at twenty-nine she had only ten mortal years on him, but the
      one-hundred and fifty some odd years she'd lived since that first
      death had given her an undeniable edge on the new ones.  And this
      one was *so* young...so *painfully* young to just be starting out.
      He would need all the help he could get.  She would give him all
      she could for as long as he needed, her promise to Sean aside.
      This promise she made to herself as she crossed the foyer to join
      Richie's companions.
      
      She stopped at the reception desk long enough to tell Peggy, her
      assistant, to take the rest of the day off, then moved across the
      room to the others.
      
      "Is everything all right?  Where's Richie?" Joe asked rapid-fire,
      openly concerned at Vanya appearing without a certain redhead in
      tow.
      
      She smiled her reassurance as they rose to meet her, gazing up into
      first one worried face, then the other.  "He's fine.  He's sleeping,
      and it seemed a good time to discuss a few things with you both."
      
      "Is that kosher...talking about him, I mean?" Joe inquired.
      
      "Doctor-patient confidentiality?  Don't worry, I have Richie's
      blessing to discuss his case with you, but I would prefer it didn't go
      any further."
      
      "It won't," Joe stated, glancing briefly at the stone-faced Scot at his
      side for confirmation.
      
      "Good," Vanya said with a nod.  She took a seat in the nearby
      circular conversation area and waited while both men did the same
      before continuing.  "Your young friend is quite adept at hiding his
      emotions when he wants to.  I also get the impression he would
      like to use his not inconsiderable charm to get around my
      questions."
      
      The Watcher snorted his agreement of that.  "He does have a talent
      for misdirection, doesn't he?  As for the charm, you wouldn't be the
      first woman to lose her train of thought when he flashed his pearly
      whites."
      
      "The smile and big blue eyes I can handle, but I am concerned with
      the almost desperate need he has to downplay his feelings."
      
      "Richie?" Joe exclaimed in surprise.  "I'd call the kid more on the
      spontaneous side.  Most of the time, anyway.  'Course if you're
      asking him questions about his past, that's something else.  Kid's
      pretty tight-lipped about that stuff."
      
      "He does show a tendency to try to shrug off the more painful
      events.  That's not uncommon, but it's not very healthy.  Sooner or
      later those emotions are going to bubble over."
      
      "Yeah, I saw a lot of that after Nam.  Some of those guys just
      snapped years later.  Held everything in too long."
      
      Duncan spoke up for the first time at that.  "Are you saying that
      Richie could snap emotionally?"
      
      "No, not at all," Vanya assured him.  "I'm just saying that if you
      bury the pain too long and too well, it can manifest itself in other
      ways.  Sleepwalking is just one of those ways."
      
      "I don't like the sound of that," Joe murmured.
      
      "Neither do I," Duncan concurred darkly.  "What can we do to get
      through to him?"
      
      "I do have an idea, if he'll agree to it."
      
      Joe leaned back in his seat and tapped his cane on the floor.  "That
      could be a big 'if'.  Richie wasn't thrilled about seeing a
      psychiatrist in the first place."
      
      Duncan brushed that off with a wave of his hand, as if Richie's
      complying were a forgone conclusion. "What's your idea?"
      
      "I'd like to hypnotize him.  Hear me out," she counseled, one hand
      raised to halt the objection she sensed was coming. "It's perfectly
      safe, you can even be in the room if Richie agrees.  I simply put
      him in a relaxed state where he's free to answer my questions
      without his conscious mind putting up obstacles.   No drugs,
      nothing against his will," she explained.  "I'm a great believer in
      first impressions and, to me, he appears to be a very forthright
      young man. Hiding his feelings as he obviously is must be quite a
      strain on him...and both of you."
      
      "Hypnotism?" Joe repeated, one eyebrow raised.  "No offense,
      Doc, but I always thought that was more of a parlor game."
      
      Korsikov smiled tolerantly.  "That's a common misconception.  I've
      been using the technique for over eighty years and it can be very
      helpful with stubborn patients."
      
      "Like Richie," Duncan supplied.
      
      "Well, normally I would recommend continued visits twice a week
      while we delved into what was behind these episodes of his."
      
      "We don't have that kind of time," the Scot reminded her, rising
      from his seat to pace the confines of their area.
      
      "In this case I don't believe we do, no," Vanya continued.  "From
      what you've witnessed, Richie's already to the point of
      self-mutilation.  I really don't want to draw out this process any
      longer than necessary.  He may be immortal, but these continued
      suicides could be causing a great deal of psychological damage,
      and that won't heal overnight."
      
      
      //His eyes opened abruptly, deepest blue, unblinking as he sat up
      and scanned his surroundings, searching...finding.
      
      He moved unerringly across the room, breathing evenly, limbs
      relaxed as his goal came within reach.
      
      A lock - an obstacle to overcome.  He drew back his fist and
      lashed out, striking the glass forcefully, shards tearing skin, bones
      snapping under the pressure.
      
      A simple thing now to reach in, pull it free, feel its weight, know
      its purpose.
      
      It fit his hands perfectly, the blade glinting in the lamplight as the
      sharp edge was turned inward.  Left hand on the hilt, right wrapped
      around the point, pain only a phantom as the edge bit into the flesh
      of the palm and fingers, blood running freely down the raised arm
      as he brought the blade above shoulder height, holding it
      horizontal, neck extended, vulnerable, ready.  It would end here.//
      
      
      Duncan nodded thoughtfully at Korsikov's words, relieved that she
      had the experience Richie needed and the willingness to use it to
      his benefit.  "If that's true, then we need to move on this right
      away."
      
      "I agree," Vanya said.  "As soon as we have Richie's blessing we--"
      
      The sound of glass shattering swung all three around to face the
      closed door to Korsikov's office.  Duncan moved first, striding
      swiftly across the foyer and throwing the door wide, Vanya close
      behind as he burst across the threshold.  The sight that greeted
      them froze the Scot in place for the space of a heartbeat, then he
      lunged across the few feet separating him from Richie and tried to
      wrestle the blade away from the young Immortal's hands.
      
      "Careful, Duncan!  Careful!" Vanya cried at his elbow, her small
      hands wrapped about one of Richie's arms, tugging fruitlessly
      against his greater strength.
      
      Surprised at the redhead's vigor, Duncan steeled himself, releasing
      his grip on the sword's hilt with his right hand and rabbit-punching
      Richie with all the force he could muster.
      
      The young man's head snapped back at the force of the blow and
      he dropped like a rock, the carpeted floor cushioning his fall only
      marginally.
      
      Duncan wasted no time in placing the scimitar behind him, well
      out of reach.  He moved to Richie's head then and, kneeling, pulled
      the young Immortal up from his prone position, resting his
      protege's upper torso against his and wrapping an arm around his
      chest to hold him in place.  With his free hand he checked for
      injuries, frowning at what he found.
      
      There were several deep cuts across the palms of both of the young
      man's hands, several going right to the bone, but it was the
      nasty-looking slashes across his throat that drew the group's
      attention.
      
      "Will they heal?" Vanya asked, voicing everyone's concerns as she
      knelt beside them, her hands moving to staunch the flow of blood
      from the wounds even as a barely discernible blue light flickered
      across them, doing the job for her.  "Thank goodness," she sighed,
      closing her eyes briefly, giving a short, silent prayer to a higher
      power.
      
      Richie cradled in his lap, Duncan looked up at Joe - his own face
      mirroring the Watcher's distress - and a silent message passed
      between them.  They turned to Vanya as one.  "When can you do
      it?"
      
      "Hypnotize him?  I would say today, but he needs to be receptive
      to it and I think after this we'll need to give him time to
      decompress...and ourselves, as well."
      
      "Tomorrow, then," Duncan intoned resolutely.
      
      "Tomorrow," she vowed with equal resolve.
      
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