Date: Fri, 17 Nov 1995 13:02:36 +0000 Reply-To: Vasna.Zago@COLORADO.EDU Sender: Highlander TV show stories From: Vasna.Zago@COLORADO.EDU Subject: The Gift 3/4 The Gift Part 3 of 4 Marie glanced around the room as the Maitre'd showed them to a table. Taking in the crisp, creamy linens, the clinking of glasses and the muted sounds of intimate conversation, she glanced down at her torn jeans and realized she was vastly underdressed. Shrugging to herself, she silently cursed MacLeod for bringing her here. Well, she'd live; she'd made it through worse things. As they sat down she smiled absently at Duncan and opened her menu. A few moments later she put it down to look around the room. "What are you going to have?" he asked. "You order for me, Duncan," she replied. "I really don't care. Food doesn't interest me much these days." "How can you not care?" he said, amazed. ""This is one of the finest restaurants in the city! Besides, indulging in wonderful food and wine is one of the great pleasures of life." Marie put a hand on his arm, feeling his warmth as it seeped through the silk shirt he was wearing. "I would expect you to say that, to care about these things," she said. "You're a sensualist at heart, Duncan. You love being in the world; you revel in all the different textures of life." "I'm surprised to find that you don't anymore," he said and paused for a moment. "You did at one time. So, what do you want, Marie?" "The truth!" she answered fiercely, surprising him with the vehemence of her response. "All my life I have been searching for it. Most of the time I can only sense it, misty-like, at the edge of my awareness, like a word on the tip of my tongue that I can't quite recall. Twice in my life I have held the truth in the palm of my hand, and both times the fire of it seared me so completely I have never recovered. The truth, Duncan! It shattered my heart and left me breathless and aching for more. How can the mundane things of life," she said, indicating her surroundings, "capture my interest? They're not even shadows of reality." There was a pause. Duncan raised an eyebrow. "I meant, what do you want for dinner?" he said, catching her eye with a knowing look. Slowly, Marie's face lightened, and then she smiled. "I think I'll have the Mediterranean pasta," she said, blushing. After dinner, Marie took Duncan's hand as they made their way out of the restaurant. "Let's walk for a bit," she said, and he nodded his agreement. Their footsteps rang on the pavement, sounding louder than usual in the dark. It was nice, she thought, to be able to enjoy the silence with another person and not feel like she had to make conversation. It had stopped raining, but the streets and the air were still damp, and bits of mist curled around their legs as they walked. She reviewed the meal in her mind; he had been right, the food was wonderful but the service had been lousy. The waiter had forgotten her order; mixed up the soups and had been incredibly surly through the whole evening. "Sorry about that waiter," Duncan said, echoing her thoughts. "Normally that place is very good." "C'mon," she said, tugging on his hand. "Let's go back and kill him." Duncan looked at her, speechless, and she burst into laughter. "I'm teasing!" He shook his head. "Sometimes with you I can never tell," he said, bemused. *************** Back at Duncan's apartment above the dojo, Marie wandered around the room, looking at his collection of antique weaponry while he brewed some coffee. "You really have some amazing things here, Duncan. This one is rather nice," she said, fingering the leather breastplate on a piece of 13th century Mongolian armor. "Have you ever thought about donating them to a museum?" "I'm not ready to part with them yet," he responded. She bent over a glass cabinet to look at a selection of carefully arranged daggers. Straightening up, she went to the kitchen to collect her coffee. "You men and your toys," she said, smiling. "I can't believe you'd say that!" Duncan said. "You've used some of these types of weapons yourself! They represent a noble lineage." "Yes," she replied, "but that was long ago, and hearts change." Duncan crossed the room to sit on the sofa beside her. "I'd like to hear how yours changed, Marie," he said softly, encouraging her to continue with her story. "When I first met you, you were struggling with something I didn't understand. An answer to a question, perhaps?" "Yes, I was searching. It was the old fever. I had spent so many years living with revenge and anger; there just had to be another way. It occurred to me that if the answers to life's questions couldn't be found in hatred, that they must be found in it's opposite. And I must admit that I have found a life of service, guided by compassion and love, a much more satisfying experience than the life I led before." She looked at him with deep affection. "You know, Duncan, I often wished that we were siblings. When I met up with you and Fitz in Italy I had such a good time! Already I was growing weary of the world. You were newly immortal, and to experience it again, fresh, through your eyes made me love it again. "You certainly turned Fitz's head," Duncan said, a bit jealous. "He could never figure out what you were doing in that hospital when you could have been riding the countryside like us. You were so single-minded and determined that nothing would interfere with your work. I'm glad we were able to pry you away from it to do a little swashbuckling," he said with a laugh and indulged in an imaginary parry. "Remember that time we challenged that fop of a nobleman, and left him tangled in his mistress's laundry? God, you were fun." His demeanor changed slowly as another memory crossed his mind. "Well, that is, until you set me up with that woman. What was her name?" "Her name was Isabel and I was trying to teach you a lesson about toying with women," Marie said firmly. "You really made me angry at times, Duncan, the way you'd jump into bed with them and be gone the next day. You should be more careful with the hearts that are entrusted to you." "You thought you were *helping*?" he asked, astonished. "I nearly had to get married!" "Oooo, how horrible for you," she shuddered sarcastically. "It would have served you right. Besides, a little character building is good for the soul." Duncan considered her words for a minute before chuckling. "I guess you were right," he admitted sheepishly. "I do seem to have a weakness in that area." "One of your greatest charms, Duncan, " Marie said, returning his laugh. "You know, one great thing about being an immortal woman is that I was never constricted by hearth and home, like the mortal women of those times. I took what I wanted, went where I wanted, and lived the life of a man." She continued, "You hadn't yet experienced the endless years of death and the horribly relentless march of time. So, I indulged you as much as possible and we played like children at times. Eventually, of course, we parted and I struck out again on my own." "But you haven't always been alone," ventured Duncan. "There have been others since Anna." "Yes, that's true. But the first flame burns the brightest, you know. Anna was my savior, my lover, my guide, my companion. How could anyone ever compare to her?" Marie answered, her eyes pools of sadness. "More than a little of me was buried that day with her." She was silent for a minute, and then roused herself, "As a matter of fact, there is someone now. Her name is Maya. We've only been together two, maybe three decades, but she's an old soul, and courageous. She's an Amazon, Duncan; you would like her." Duncan laughed. "An Amazon? I think the real question is whether she would like *me*? Where do you find these woman, Marie? As Connor would say: 'you get all the good women and most of the fun.'" "Thank you," Marie responded with a slight bow. "I met her in Brazil when I decided to tour South America. I had never spent much time there and was curious about the continent. She was running a clinic for native women; her work is really quite marvelous, Duncan. Well, she is a trifle strong-minded when it comes to men," Marie said, winking at him, "but she does try. In many ways she reminds me of Anna. I love her very much, but I don't have any illusions about her. Her ego is too strong, and I didn't feel I could ask her such a great favor." "What favor?" Duncan interjected. "I'm getting there!" Marie said. "Give me a few more minutes. After I left you, I continued my work and my quest for the truth. I studied the known religions, and crossed many lands to seek out men and women of wisdom and knowledge. I read every theological book I could find, from the Mahabarata to the Koran. I studied the great religious and philosophical leaders from Lao-tzu to Christ, and incorporated bits and pieces of wisdom from any source that suited me. I wandered Europe and the east, working in hospitals, following wars. I nursed the sick and the dying, binding their wounds, holding their hands, writing letters for them, closing their eyes when death, at last, would mercifully claim them. So much blood and loss!" Anna said grimly, her eyes clouding over. "When I couldn't take it anymore, when I had to escape from the endless sea of broken bodies, I'd retire to a convent or one of my estates for a few years and study some more. Or I'd travel, looking for a holy man or woman to learn from before returning to my work. In all those years I never lacked for a place where I could be useful. There's never been a shortage of wars, has there?" A flood of memories engulfed him. The Huguenots, the Netherlands Revolt, the Spanish Armada, the Irish Conflict, the Unification of Japan, the Thirty Years War, the invasions of the Turks, the French and Indian Wars, the Wars of the Ukraine, the Napoleonic Wars, the Russian Revolution, the Anglo-Dutch wars; the list went on and on. He had fought in many of them; she had worked to stop them. They were often on opposite sides of a conflict, Duncan realized, but through it all, he had admired her convictions and sense of purpose, and she had respected his. "Well," she continued, "after a long while, I kind of merged with the flow of life and time. It became unimportant who I am, or what the outcome of the Game will be. My life has focused only on service and love. And, in a way, time has ceased to matter. The past is my left hand, the future my right; when I bring them together in service they create the present." She held out her hands, looking at them as though they belonged to someone else. "But I've grown so weary, Duncan. Remove fear and desire, add eternity, and the outcome is apathy. I have lived for nearly 900 years and I'm tired of it. I have experienced everything available to me. I've loved and been loved, and it's been a good life. And so we come to my request, my sweet old friend. I ask this of you because I know you care for me," Marie said as she laid a hand on his arm. "Duncan, I want you to kill me." *************** "WHAT?" Duncan managed. "Are ye daft, lass? I will nae!" Marie laughed, but there was a raw edge to her voice. "I never thought I'd hear that lovely accent again. I didn't mean to scare you, Duncan." "No way, Marie," he said, horrified. He got up and began to pace around the room. "I won't do it!" "Listen to me Duncan, and listen carefully," Marie said sternly. "I have already decided to end this existence. The only question is how. Do you know how many quickenings I have taken?" He looked at her, the question on his lips. "A hell of a lot!" she said. "More than twice as many as you. I have quite a bit of accumulated knowledge and power and I have thought carefully on where I want to bestow it. I believe the time is coming when the balance of things will become more important than it ever has. As much as I tire of the Game, I understand it will continue without me, and I like to think that my energy, wherever it is bestowed, will have no small impact on the outcome." "What about Maya?" Duncan asked. "If you're so set on doing this, why not her?" "I don't think Maya will make it," Marie responded. "She's a great warrior, but quick to temper, and she doesn't have enough compassion. She will be upset when she hears of my death, but I think she will be more upset that I chose not to give her my gift." "If Anna was still alive, I would give my quickening to her. What a leader she would have made! But she fell ages ago; in honor of her I must try to place my power where it will do the most good." Marie leaned back, exhausted by her outburst. A smile crossed her face as looked at Duncan, but there was no light in her. "I have great hopes for you, Highlander," she continued. "You have stamina, and you are good and full of purpose. The world could do much worse than have you win the prize." "Gee, thanks Marie," Duncan replied. "Don't mock me, Duncan. I have valued my life, such as it is, and the gift I am giving is great. It may serve you well. I'm concerned, however, about your single-mindedness. Over the years, I have seen you become more judgmental, and your morality grows. These are not beneficial traits for a teacher, Duncan. I know you have also walked the line between crusades and compassion. There's no one who is entirely good or entirely evil. You, yourself, have made errors of judgment. Remember what you told me about the native boy? Or the matter of Mikey?" "What were we supposed to do with Mikey?" Duncan said, exasperated. "We couldn't just let him wander around! He was hurting people." "Why was it *your* decision to choose his life's course?" Marie said gently, and Duncan fell silent. "I don't mean to chastise you, Duncan. I only want to point out that if you gain the prize, you must be clear on your relationship with the mortals. You must let yourself see all parts of the issue, especially those parts that you disagree with. I want to give you my power, so that you may gain the insights I have struggled for. Why are you shaking your head? If I am going to give my power away, why shouldn't you be the one to take it; to benefit from it? Why let someone else have my quickening?" Duncan turned a pained face toward her, his stomach knotting with anxiety. "Do you realize what you are doing to me?" he whispered. Marie leaned back in her chair. "Yes, Duncan, I do. I know exactly what I am doing to you. I am tempting you." *************** "This is a joke, right, Marie? You're putting me on. This is another one of your tests, just like last time, and the time before that. Well, it's not funny. And while I'm on the subject, I'm getting pretty tired of this. You show up every century or so and try something." "I'm not toying with you, Duncan," Marie responded. "Do you understand why I did what I did last time we saw each other? The reason I betrayed you to the confederate soldiers?" "No! I don't! Explain it to me, Marie," Duncan said angrily. "I thought that maybe if you spent some time as a prisoner of war that you would see the other half of the picture. Unfortunately," she said, blushing, "they hung you before I could stop it. You thought you were being honorable in freeing those slaves. Do you know where those slaves went? They went to live in Arlington, on the confiscated Lee estate, to die of disease and starvation by the hundreds. They died miserably, but free. How honorable for you." "You and Lucas were both on the wrong side." "Duncan! Do you really still believe there was a right and a wrong side? There was only war, and everybody lost." Duncan looked a little confused. "I could have stayed buried until they built a high-rise there, you know," he said bitterly. Marie looked him straight in the eye. "Who do you think sent Lucas to dig you up? I'm sorry if you misunderstood my motives, Duncan. I'm not doing that now, I promise." "It wasn't a very pleasant experience," he said. His statement annoyed her. "Life is *series* of unpleasant experiences!" She yelled at him. "It's what we do afterwards that counts!" Marie stopped to compose herself and gather her thoughts. "Look, Duncan, I'm just making you an offer. And I'm being perfectly open and honest as to my reasons, and why I think you should accept. It's true that in the past I have engaged in certain behavior in regards to you, but my intentions have been honorable. In my own way, I have been trying to help you. After all, a little character building is good for the soul." "Where have I heard that before?" Duncan said, exasperated. He stopped pacing and sat down heavily in a chair opposite her. Shaking his head and throwing up his hands, he glared at her. "I really don't believe this!" Marie sat on the sofa quietly and stared at Duncan. The force of her gaze made his eyes drop. Sighing heavily, he asked, "What makes you think you can determine your own fate? Your ego is running amuck, Marie. It is not up to us to choose." "I may not choose for others, but I can for myself. Who knows better than we the great sorrows of life, Duncan?" Marie responded firmly. "Who can choose better than us? My fate was given to me when I died that first time. Accept the gift I offer! I would much rather you take my quickening than throw it away in a random event. And if you won't do it, I leave it to God to place me in the path of some immortal who will." "Even if I agreed, and I said IF, it would be a catastrophe. With Mikey it was different. He couldn't be left to wander around. What Richie and I did still haunts me. You, however, are sound of mind and have great potential. You could win the prize! And you want me to kill you, in the prime of your knowledge and power. How do you expect me to live with that?" "Now you are tempting me!" Marie smiled knowingly, but shook her head. "No, I came to the understanding about fifty years ago that this is what I want to do. Every once in a while I take an interest in life again, but it doesn't last long." Duncan opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off. "I don't have to explain the drawbacks of immortality to you, Duncan. I know the years have weighed heavy on you. But I sense an acceleration in the Gathering now. I think that you will soon rise to the peak of your power. You'll need all the support you can muster and that's why you'll honor my request. I know you will. The temptation is too great. All of my power and experience, yours for the taking? And you'll get over it eventually. After all, time is a wonderful rationalizer." "Only if you're around to enjoy it," he said. "I'm sorry, Marie, I just can't. It wouldn't be right. You know what Darius said: life chooses life." "Then I must be already dead," she answered bitterly. Duncan did not look at her or respond. "Promise me you'll think about it?" she asked. "It's what I want." "I'll think about it, but I'm not going to change my mind." "We'll see," Marie said. *************** Duncan picked up the phone on the third ring. "Come have dinner with me!" Marie said over the line. He hesitated and she coaxed "C'mon, Highlander. You haven't spoken to me in days. Even condemned prisoners get a last meal." "All right," he said. "I'll meet you at that new bistro on Park Street at 7 o'clock tonight." "Good! And, Duncan?" "Yes, Marie?" "It's your treat," she said. *************** Duncan swirled the last bit of Bordeaux in his glass before draining it. He smiled at Marie across the table, glad he had accepted her invitation. "I'd forgotten what pleasant company you can be," he said. "You mean when I'm not lecturing or being morbid?" she laughed. "Well, yes," he said, taking her hand fondly. The wine was affecting him; he might say something stupid if he didn't get some fresh air soon. Walking to the corner, they paused and Duncan touched her face with the tips of his fingers. It felt warm and smooth. "I'm glad you changed your mind," he said, leaning down to kiss her cheek. She didn't answer, but lingered a moment, resting her head against his chest before reaching up and pulling his lips to hers in a sorrowful kiss. "I've done no such thing," she whispered, turning and running down the street. Duncan watched where she had gone, an alarm building within. Suddenly, he felt the presence of another immortal and fear wrenched a knot in the pit of his stomach. In her current mood who knows what she might do; she refused to carry even a small weapon. He ran down the street, hoping he was going to reach her in time. Duncan found the two immortals in a nearby alley. Marie was backed into the corner, her hands instinctively raised as her only defense. She looked defiant but unafraid and Duncan realized with a shock that she had spoken the truth. She was going to let this nameless bastard take her head! The man was approaching her slowly, his sword up, poised for the killing blow. Marie spotted Duncan and cried out his name. The other immortal spun around to face him, and Duncan drew his sword. "Leave the lady alone," he said, quietly but intently. "You have an unfair advantage." The man bowed. "Then I shall have the honor of taking your head in exchange," he responded. "We'll see," said Duncan, settling into his fighting stance. This was going to be like brushing off a fly. Their swords met, the clanging of the steel echoing through the alley as Marie watched, her eyes shining with disappointed relief. The fight was brief; the stranger was not very skilled. Perhaps that was why he had followed Marie, Duncan thought. She was an easy target. Then, all thought was torn away as the quickening descended upon him. Waves of energy ripped through him, slamming him down on his knees and knocking the breath out of him. His body jerked helplessly as the energy raced through him. When it subsided and he could take a few shaky breaths, Marie went to his side and helped him up. "I should have let him take your head," he said, dusting himself off. "But that would have been so unchivalrous," she said, smiling. "Yes, but it would have saved me from this dilemma you keep putting me in," he replied. He hugged her tightly, feeling exasperated, angry and relieved all at the same time. Looking to the skies he turned up his collar; it was starting to drizzle. Damned if it wasn't going to snow. He grabbed her hand and dragged her down the street towards his car, his long legs in full stride, forcing her to run to keep up. Realizing the depth of his anger, she had the good sense not to say a single word during the entire ride home. Back at his apartment above the dojo, Duncan uncorked a Beaujolais and poured each of them a glass. "What am I going to do with you?" he said. "Do what I ask!" Marie replied. "Take my head! I promise I won't hold it against you." "How can you be so cavalier about this?" he responded. "I told you before, either you take my head or I give it to some random immortal, like in the alley tonight. Do us both a favor, Duncan. You can't shield me forever." "If I could understand *why* it might be easier," Duncan said, shaking his head. "I can't explain it any better than I already have," Marie answered, sitting on the sofa and putting her head in her hands. She began to cry. "Don't torture me like this, Duncan. Let me go." "I can't," he whispered. Marie looked at him, her tear-streaked face filled with anguish. "I hear Anna calling me, Duncan. She has been calling to me for a year now. I see her on street corners, beckoning to me; I hear her in my dreams. Every waking moment is agony. I ache to be with her." She looked directly at him. "If Tessa called to you, Duncan, wouldn't you go?" He felt as if she had pierced him with a knife. Stricken into silence, he crossed the room to sit next to her on the sofa. Taking her face in his hands he locked her gaze with his. In her eyes he saw determination, understanding and deep sorrow. All of this and not a trace of fear. She was truly ready to go. He released her and sighed. He couldn't believe what he was thinking. He was really going to agree to this? "Very well, Marie, I'll do it. May heaven forgive us both." Even as she breathed a sigh of relief and embraced him, Duncan felt the first few pangs of guilt twisting in his stomach. She was right. He was not doing this only for her. End of Part 3 =========================================================================